Who Was Samantha Dillingham? The Untold Story Of Tom Hanks’ First Wife

Introduction: The Woman Behind A Hollywood Legend

When people think of Tom Hanks, they picture one of Hollywood’s most beloved actors — the man behind classics like Forrest Gump, Saving Private Ryan, and Cast Away. But before he became one of the most respected names in film, Tom Hanks was a young actor finding his way in life and love. Long before his marriage to Rita Wilson, Hanks was married to Samantha Dillingham — the woman who shared his early struggles, dreams, and heartbreaks.

Known professionally as Samantha Lewes, she lived a life that was both inspiring and deeply tragic. For years, she stayed out of the public spotlight, but her name has resurfaced thanks to her daughter, Elizabeth Ann Hanks, whose new memoir reveals the complex story of her mother’s life and the shadows that shaped their family.

This is the untold story of Samantha Dillingham — actress, mother, and the first love of Tom Hanks — whose life was filled with talent, hardship, and heartbreak.

Quick Bio Information

Full Name: Susan Jane Dillingham
Stage Name: Samantha Lewes
Date Of Birth: November 29, 1952
Place Of Birth: San Diego, California, USA
Date Of Death: March 12, 2002
Cause Of Death: Lung Cancer
Occupation: Actress
Known For: Bosom Buddies (1980), Mr. Success (1984)
Spouse: Tom Hanks (m. 1978–1987)
Children: Colin Hanks and Elizabeth Ann Hanks
Education: Sacramento State University

Early Life Of Samantha Dillingham

Samantha Jane Dillingham was born on November 29, 1952, in San Diego, California. Growing up in a modest household, she developed an early love for theater and storytelling. Her passion for performing led her to pursue acting, which later became an important part of her identity.

After completing high school, she attended Sacramento State University, where she joined the drama program. It was there that her life took a turn that would forever change her future — she met a fellow theater student named Tom Hanks. Both were young, ambitious, and deeply passionate about acting. What began as a friendship blossomed into a relationship that would define much of their early adult lives.

Despite limited resources, Dillingham’s determination and charm were evident. Her peers remembered her as intelligent, creative, and deeply empathetic — qualities that would later influence her roles both on screen and in life.

Love And Partnership With Tom Hanks

Samantha Dillingham and Tom Hanks met during their university years, bonding over their shared dreams of performing on stage. They were both struggling actors trying to find their place in the world, often performing in local theater productions while juggling jobs to make ends meet.

Their connection was immediate, and their partnership soon turned romantic. In 1977, they welcomed their first child, Colin Hanks, and married the following year. Five years later, in 1982, they celebrated the birth of their daughter, Elizabeth Ann Hanks.

These were years of uncertainty for the young couple. Tom’s acting career was just beginning to take shape, and Samantha supported him in every way she could while also trying to pursue her own acting dreams. Together, they navigated the challenges of young parenthood, financial strain, and the pressures of a budding Hollywood career.

Samantha Dillingham’s Acting Career

Although her career was brief, Samantha Dillingham, who went by the stage name Samantha Lewes, made appearances in a few well-known television projects. She appeared alongside her husband in Bosom Buddies (1980), one of Tom Hanks’ early comedy series, and later took a role in Mr. Success (1984).

While her screen time was limited, her love for performance remained strong. Those who knew her said she had a natural presence and an expressive emotional depth that could captivate audiences. Unfortunately, as Tom’s star began to rise, Samantha’s career took a back seat to family responsibilities.

The Hollywood spotlight that brightened Tom’s future often cast a shadow over hers. Despite her talent, Samantha found it difficult to maintain her career while raising two young children, and she gradually stepped away from acting to focus on her family.

The Strain Of Fame And The End Of Their Marriage

As Tom Hanks’ career gained momentum in the mid-1980s, the couple’s relationship began to face serious strain. The demands of fame, combined with personal and emotional challenges, created distance between them.

They separated in 1985 and finalized their divorce in 1987 after nearly a decade of marriage. Their split was difficult for both, but especially for Samantha, who had primary custody of Colin and Elizabeth. Tom later remarried actress Rita Wilson in 1988, with whom he built a long-lasting relationship and had two more sons, Chet and Truman.

While Tom’s career flourished, Samantha chose a quieter path, focusing on raising her children away from Hollywood’s constant spotlight. Yet, beneath the surface, she was battling emotional struggles that few knew about.

Life After Divorce: Challenges And Isolation

Following the divorce, Samantha Dillingham moved with her children to Sacramento. Life as a single mother was not easy. Elizabeth later revealed in her memoir that her mother became increasingly isolated and withdrawn over time.

What began as a peaceful home slowly descended into chaos. Elizabeth recalled in her book that their Sacramento house became cluttered, unkempt, and at times unsafe. Samantha reportedly spent long hours alone, often reading the Bible or struggling with deep emotional distress.

Tom remained involved in his children’s lives, but custody laws meant he could only see them during weekends and school breaks. As a result, Elizabeth and Colin spent much of their early years under their mother’s care, where instability and confusion often reigned.

A Troubled Past Revealed Through Her Daughter’s Memoir

In 2025, Elizabeth Ann Hanks, Samantha’s daughter, released a memoir titled “The 10: A Memoir of Family and the Open Road.” In it, she reveals painful details about her mother’s mental health and her own difficult childhood.

Elizabeth describes episodes of emotional and physical abuse — moments when her mother would push, shake, or even lock her in a closet. She also spoke of neglect, explaining that she grew up without learning basic hygiene or having consistent adult guidance.

However, the book also explores compassion and understanding. During a six-month journey to Florida to trace her mother’s roots, Elizabeth found a diary written by Samantha that described disturbing childhood experiences, including witnessing or experiencing horrific abuse. Elizabeth later suggested that this may have been her mother’s way of expressing trauma she herself endured as a child.

This revelation brought new perspective to Samantha’s struggles — painting her not as a villain, but as a deeply wounded person fighting inner battles no one fully understood.

Understanding Samantha Dillingham’s Mental Health Struggles

Elizabeth believes that her mother suffered from bipolar disorder and paranoia, though she was never officially diagnosed. The signs of these struggles became more evident as Samantha grew older, especially in her isolation, mood swings, and delusions.

Despite the pain, there were moments of love and warmth. Elizabeth remembered times when her mother would bake cookies for her friends or let her experiment with hair dye — glimpses of joy that still shone through the darkness.

As Samantha’s condition worsened, Tom Hanks eventually gained primary custody of the children. Over time, Samantha’s contact with her kids became limited to holidays and scheduled visits.

Her story serves as a painful reminder of how untreated mental illness can destroy families — but also how understanding and forgiveness can help generations heal.

Tom Hanks’ Quiet Support And Family Healing

Tom Hanks rarely discusses his first marriage in public, choosing to focus on his family’s healing rather than the pain of the past. His wife, Rita Wilson, revealed in an interview that Tom had gone through a period of emotional turmoil during his divorce, but eventually found peace in moving forward.

Despite the hardships, Tom has always remained supportive of his children. In interviews, Elizabeth described her father as her greatest source of strength, crediting him for teaching her to face truth and move forward with grace.

Today, Tom’s relationship with his four children — Colin, Elizabeth, Chet, and Truman — reflects a family that has faced pain but learned to rise above it.

The Final Years And Legacy Of Samantha Dillingham

In her later years, Samantha Dillingham lived a quiet life away from Hollywood. Tragically, she was diagnosed with lung cancer and passed away in 2002, at just 49 years old.

Her death deeply affected both of her children, especially Elizabeth, who later described it as a loss that reshaped her understanding of family, love, and forgiveness.

Though Samantha’s life was filled with struggle, her story continues to inspire conversations about mental health, trauma, and resilience. Through her daughter’s writing, her life is now remembered not only for its pain but also for its humanity and complexity.

Conclusion: Remembering Samantha Dillingham’s Real Story

Samantha Dillingham’s story is a reminder that behind every famous figure lies a web of untold personal histories. She was more than just “Tom Hanks’ first wife.” She was a talented actress, a mother, and a woman who faced profound personal challenges.

Her daughter’s memoir has given her a voice once again — a chance to be remembered not for her struggles alone, but for her humanity. By confronting the pain of the past, Elizabeth Hanks has shown that love, honesty, and understanding can bring healing, even after years of silence.

Though Samantha Dillingham’s life ended too soon, her story continues to live on, teaching us about compassion, mental health awareness, and the enduring strength of family.

FAQs About Samantha Dillingham

Who Was Samantha Dillingham?
Samantha Dillingham, also known by her stage name Samantha Lewes, was an American actress best known as the first wife of actor Tom Hanks. She appeared in Bosom Buddies and Mr. Success and was the mother of Colin and Elizabeth Hanks.

When And Where Was Samantha Dillingham Born?
She was born on November 29, 1952, in San Diego, California, USA.

How Did Samantha Dillingham And Tom Hanks Meet?
They met while studying theater at Sacramento State University. Their shared passion for acting brought them together, and they married in 1978.

How Many Children Did Samantha Dillingham Have?
She had two children with Tom Hanks: Colin Hanks, who became an actor, and Elizabeth Ann Hanks, who became a writer and actress.

What Happened To Samantha Dillingham After Her Divorce?
After her divorce from Tom Hanks, she lived a private life in Sacramento, raising her children and struggling with mental health issues.

How Did Samantha Dillingham Die?
She passed away from lung cancer in 2002 at the age of 49.

What Is The Legacy Of Samantha Dillingham Today?
Her legacy lives on through her children, particularly her daughter Elizabeth, whose memoir has shed light on Samantha’s life, struggles, and resilience. She is remembered as a woman of depth, emotion, and courage.

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